Are YOU Tough?
Athabasca Glacier, Alberta, Canada
Are you tough? Do you know someone who is? What is tough? I have a new idea of what being tough is. I think being tough is not just a physical trait, it is also being emotionally tough and caring as well. True toughness is someone who can take on burdens from others to lighten their load and do it willingly.
I had the privilege of spending the weekend with someone I consider tough. He is honorable, has had a long career of serving our country in multiple ways and for multiple agencies/organizations. I have always looked up to him as long as I’ve known him. This weekend was different though. What started as a hunting trip turned into something else. We were able to talk about things we deal with as men and as fathers without any distractions. Normally our conversations are about hunting or about fun things we’ve done. This time it was about hard the hard stuff. It was refreshing to express those feelings to someone who can really understand how I feel.
As men we don’t typically like to talk about things. We tend to keep our feelings bottled up. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad, we keep them bottled up inside. That is something we need to change. We need to find some guys we can open up to, people we can do life with, men we can trust. Unfortunately, it is getting harder to find these days in our culture unfortunately. Integrity is a rare thing these days. A large percentage of men are weak, morally unstable, and refuse to stand in the gap to lead as we are instructed to do in the bible.
When we find a group of men we can trust, we form a bond that can’t be broken. No matter how we feel, we have someone who is willing to help or at least listen to our whining. They may make us mad with their response, because the truth is hard sometimes, but that’s ok. We need that, we need to have someone to show us our blind spots because we all have them.
1 Corinthians 12:7 reads “A spiritual gift is given to each of us so we can help each other.” I take that as meaning we are all on the Earth for a reason. Each of us has a gift we are supposed to use to help each other. We may also be the only one with that specific gift. If we choose to ignore it, one of our brothers may be missing the encouragement they need to step out of brokenness, or to step into victory in their lives.
I know I wrote to the men this week, but all of this applies to women as well. Typically, our culture affords women the opportunity to have close emotional friendships, but that doesn’t mean they always happen. If you don’t have some people that you can open up to, find some. As I have learned in the past year, having a community of caring people to support you makes life so much better in every way. I truly appreciate everyone who has spoken words into me really all my life but especially in the last year. All I can do is hope I am standing in the gap for others that need my support as well.
This week, choose to be tough for someone. You won’t be disappointed in your choice.