Feeling Lost

Fallen Tree in the Middle of the Forest

I found myself feeling different this week. I felt lost, unsure, and unmotivated. Normally, I am driven, I have a direction I am working towards, and I am eager to push through hardships to accomplish my goals. 

I told a friend this week that I feel like Tom Hanks in the movie Saving Private Ryan. He was forced to be on a path that he didn’t necessarily believe in, surrounded by people who doubted him, had the odds stacked against him, but still had to push through and ultimately succeed in the end.

I know it’s a weird perspective to take on that movie and my life, but It’s how I feel. I have all these ideas, goals, and dreams, but the reality of life seems to make those things seem out of reach sometimes. Sometimes I feel I won’t be able to accomplish my goals due to, (insert random reason here). I can come up with so many reasons, excuses, or circumstances to stop trying and just go with the flow.

The problem is, I have done that for the past couple of decades. I know where that path leads. I understand I am capable of so much more than that. At least I realize those thoughts now. I can see the fault in them. I used to not be able to see past the circumstances and would give up without trying but these days, even when faced with hardships, I will continue to push until I can’t push anymore.

I refuse to stay lost. I refuse to stay hidden. I refuse to continue playing the small game. Even when I don’t feel like it. That’s the difference. It’s easy to work hard when everything is going great. It takes strength and determination to keep going when things get hard, or life puts obstacles in the way. 

This passage from the Book of Luke, spoke to me this week. I felt like I was being hidden, and no one could see the light from me. It gave me 

33  “No one lights a lamp and then hides it or puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where its light can be seen by all who enter the house.

34  “Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light. But when it is unhealthy, your body is filled with darkness. 35 Make sure that the light you think you have is not actually darkness. 36 If you are filled with light, with no dark corners, then your whole life will be radiant, as though a floodlight were filling you with light.”  - Luke 11 : 33-36 NLT

This week, I encourage you to be the light in the world, don’t let anyone dim your light, and be the person you are meant to be, regardless of whatever circumstances are put in your way.

-Kyle